Sea of Colour
Earlier this month, I was invited to a Fulani wedding - the cousin of a team contact in Niger. Normally, a Fulani wedding is an all-day event; starting in the morning and lasting until well after midnight. Though I did not stay the entire time, the wedding marked my longest stay - to that date - in a village! My host - Abdoulaye - said that we would head to the village at 12 and leave there around 2 or 3 at the latest. (It was 8 pm by the time I arrived back at my house!)
The Fulani wedding is a highly charged family affair. However, the main difference to the Fulani wedding is that the bride and groom do not see each other throughout the day!
I arrived in the village around 1 pm, after driving through some of my deepest sand yet, and spent the next while in the hut of the groom's family. I then sat outside under a tree with Abdoulaye and all his cousins.
Now, Abdoulaye can speak French as well as Fulfulde (and some English as well); however, I quickly learned that he was serious about my making the effort to communicate with his family and the villagers in my own right. At one point, one of the gentlemen there asked me a question about my truck (as he spoke too fast, those were the only two words I understood in the sentence 'your truck'). I asked him to repeat himself two times and then noticed Abdoulaye watching me. When I looked at him, he just shrugged, smiled and turned back to his cousins. I asked this man to repeat himself two more times when Abdoulaye stepped in to say that if I could repeat the sentence, he would translate it for me. Unfortunately, as this man spoke too fast, I was unable to pick out words that I did not know. So, to this day, I do not know what this man so desperately wanted to know about my truck!
Throughout the early afternoon, the path to the hut was constant traffic, the Africans passing by and milling at the hut a sea of colour in their various pagne cloth and the bassin material irridescent and shimmering as the sun and shadows played off the colours. The ladies always carrying a bowl or ceramic pot on their head - bringing their wedding gift: water, millet (grain), milk, or rice. I saw a few arrive with live chickens!
The lunch meal was served around 3 o'clock and in traditional African style.
This little girl was so cute - mimicing the older women by stirring her own pot of water. Though by looking at the water now, I'm not sure if I want to know where that water went.
The men and women do not eat together, so I sat around a little pot with Abdoulaye's aunt.
Abdoulaye and his guy cousins sat behind us in a circle with their platter and then behind them all the girl cousins with another platter. The meal was rice and sauce and was amazing! I believe a tomatoe based sauce with some pumpkin and other vegetables. We also each received a cut of meat (sheep or goat) on a bone. This also provides a bit of quandry - I know that meat is reserved for special occassions and am never sure if I should leave the meat for them as they rarely at it, or if as the guest I should eat some as well. Abdoulaye's aunt solved the problem by pulling the meat off the bone and placing it in front of me (Though I snuck one piece with gristle back to her side when she wasn't looking!).
I also learned that the Fulani do not drink during a meal and that to start drinking is a signal that you are done. For, each time I reached towards my water bottle, she asked if I was finished. This makes sense though, as water is in either a bowl or container with a cup, and you hold the bowl or scoop this cup with your hands - one of which (the right) is sticky and gooey from eating with your hand. So, one would want to save the drinking until after eating and the hands are washed before handling the water bowl or cup.
After we ate, a delegation of ladies from the groom's family headed off with large bowls of food for the bride's family.
We headed off to check out the festivites around the village area. The first visit was the bride's hut, which was a contrast to the party we had left. The young bride spends the day curled on the bed ('mourning') with two attendants. She is not to show her face to the groom. Abdoulaye wanted me to take a picture of her (yes, that felt extremely socially awkward) and it took a while for the guys to convince her the groom was not there and to sit up and take the veil off her face for the picture. She did like the end result though!
I also told her congratulations for the marriage - as per instructions from my language tutor. However, the ceremony had not yet taken place (usually, I believe, this is done in the morning), so I sent the guardian-lady into a tizzy as she inquired if the ceremony was done. The guys had to smooth over the white lady's error!
Walking further down the road into the village proper, we saw the groom and his family celebrating. A much different picture here!! The groom is outside, sitting with all his friends, eating, laughing and having a good time! (pictured here in the centre)
We stayed here for a while and then headed back to the first hut in time to see the delegation for the ceremony walking off to the ceremony site. Abdoulaye's aunt motioned for me to join here and I followed along. The group sits men and women apart for this as well.
The ceremony is the moment when the bride and groom are joined in marriage - yet, neither of them are there! The blessings are pronounced and then the ladies pass around cola nuts and dates.
I received a mixed handful; however, the giver quickly took back all the dates and 'blessed' me with a handful of cola nuts! Now, I don't like the cola nuts, though all the Fulani women love (and are quite addicted) to these. They are odd little fruit things, more like chomping on a parsnip in texture; however, the second you bite into the fruit, all the moisture in your mouth is sucked into the fruit and you are left with a dry bitter taste! Definitely not my favourite! Abdoulaye's aunt asked if I ate the cola nuts and I mentioned 'no', so she traded all my cola nuts for another lady's dates. I didn't have the heart to tell her I don't like dates either; but I figured if I was going to be required to eat something in front of them, I preferred the dates.
We left shortly after the ceremony. However, the party continues on for hours - separate still - until between 10pm and midnight when the bride is brought over to the groom's hut. The groom verifies it is her, though she has been instructed not to let him lift the veil off her face until he tries three times. Then he returns outside and the party continues until the wee hours of the morning when everyone retires.
Various Photos from the Day:
This guy is teasing his Uncle that his outfit is so large that he could fit inside too!! Note the Uncle reaching for the stick with which to whack his nephew!
Village ladies drawing water from the well and the donkeys waiting to carry the load.
Now, Abdoulaye can speak French as well as Fulfulde (and some English as well); however, I quickly learned that he was serious about my making the effort to communicate with his family and the villagers in my own right. At one point, one of the gentlemen there asked me a question about my truck (as he spoke too fast, those were the only two words I understood in the sentence 'your truck'). I asked him to repeat himself two times and then noticed Abdoulaye watching me. When I looked at him, he just shrugged, smiled and turned back to his cousins. I asked this man to repeat himself two more times when Abdoulaye stepped in to say that if I could repeat the sentence, he would translate it for me. Unfortunately, as this man spoke too fast, I was unable to pick out words that I did not know. So, to this day, I do not know what this man so desperately wanted to know about my truck!
Throughout the early afternoon, the path to the hut was constant traffic, the Africans passing by and milling at the hut a sea of colour in their various pagne cloth and the bassin material irridescent and shimmering as the sun and shadows played off the colours. The ladies always carrying a bowl or ceramic pot on their head - bringing their wedding gift: water, millet (grain), milk, or rice. I saw a few arrive with live chickens!
The lunch meal was served around 3 o'clock and in traditional African style.
This little girl was so cute - mimicing the older women by stirring her own pot of water. Though by looking at the water now, I'm not sure if I want to know where that water went.
The men and women do not eat together, so I sat around a little pot with Abdoulaye's aunt.
Abdoulaye and his guy cousins sat behind us in a circle with their platter and then behind them all the girl cousins with another platter. The meal was rice and sauce and was amazing! I believe a tomatoe based sauce with some pumpkin and other vegetables. We also each received a cut of meat (sheep or goat) on a bone. This also provides a bit of quandry - I know that meat is reserved for special occassions and am never sure if I should leave the meat for them as they rarely at it, or if as the guest I should eat some as well. Abdoulaye's aunt solved the problem by pulling the meat off the bone and placing it in front of me (Though I snuck one piece with gristle back to her side when she wasn't looking!).
I also learned that the Fulani do not drink during a meal and that to start drinking is a signal that you are done. For, each time I reached towards my water bottle, she asked if I was finished. This makes sense though, as water is in either a bowl or container with a cup, and you hold the bowl or scoop this cup with your hands - one of which (the right) is sticky and gooey from eating with your hand. So, one would want to save the drinking until after eating and the hands are washed before handling the water bowl or cup.
After we ate, a delegation of ladies from the groom's family headed off with large bowls of food for the bride's family.
We headed off to check out the festivites around the village area. The first visit was the bride's hut, which was a contrast to the party we had left. The young bride spends the day curled on the bed ('mourning') with two attendants. She is not to show her face to the groom. Abdoulaye wanted me to take a picture of her (yes, that felt extremely socially awkward) and it took a while for the guys to convince her the groom was not there and to sit up and take the veil off her face for the picture. She did like the end result though!
I also told her congratulations for the marriage - as per instructions from my language tutor. However, the ceremony had not yet taken place (usually, I believe, this is done in the morning), so I sent the guardian-lady into a tizzy as she inquired if the ceremony was done. The guys had to smooth over the white lady's error!
Walking further down the road into the village proper, we saw the groom and his family celebrating. A much different picture here!! The groom is outside, sitting with all his friends, eating, laughing and having a good time! (pictured here in the centre)
We stayed here for a while and then headed back to the first hut in time to see the delegation for the ceremony walking off to the ceremony site. Abdoulaye's aunt motioned for me to join here and I followed along. The group sits men and women apart for this as well.
The ceremony is the moment when the bride and groom are joined in marriage - yet, neither of them are there! The blessings are pronounced and then the ladies pass around cola nuts and dates.
I received a mixed handful; however, the giver quickly took back all the dates and 'blessed' me with a handful of cola nuts! Now, I don't like the cola nuts, though all the Fulani women love (and are quite addicted) to these. They are odd little fruit things, more like chomping on a parsnip in texture; however, the second you bite into the fruit, all the moisture in your mouth is sucked into the fruit and you are left with a dry bitter taste! Definitely not my favourite! Abdoulaye's aunt asked if I ate the cola nuts and I mentioned 'no', so she traded all my cola nuts for another lady's dates. I didn't have the heart to tell her I don't like dates either; but I figured if I was going to be required to eat something in front of them, I preferred the dates.
We left shortly after the ceremony. However, the party continues on for hours - separate still - until between 10pm and midnight when the bride is brought over to the groom's hut. The groom verifies it is her, though she has been instructed not to let him lift the veil off her face until he tries three times. Then he returns outside and the party continues until the wee hours of the morning when everyone retires.
Various Photos from the Day:
This guy is teasing his Uncle that his outfit is so large that he could fit inside too!! Note the Uncle reaching for the stick with which to whack his nephew!
Village ladies drawing water from the well and the donkeys waiting to carry the load.
3 comments:
Very interesting! I am especially intrigued by the marriage ceremony with neither the bride nor groom present. Thanks for posting the pictures too! Also, what happens if when the bride is delivered to him it isn't the right one? Does he have to take her anyway?
Jenn
I like the pictures at the end from around the well. Great colors! I cant wait to go to a tamasheq wedding, although they sound very similar is customs. thanks for sharing the photos and story! and of the bride picture, is she on the left or right?
The bride is on the right - with the veil on her head.
I haven't heard of the wrong bride ever being delivered. Interesting question! Will have to ask someone and get back to you.
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